What do you want me to say?
by drsweetsgirl
Summary: Ted and Barney get a visit from Ted's sister Heather at MacLaren's one night. Some of Ted's issues are explained and Barney has tiny fibers. References to Non-con/Child Abuse. BTW the Heather in this story gets her personality from Josh's sister in US version of Being Human. I don't know why, just how I wrote her, but that has nothing to do with the story.


This came to me in a dream, as most things do. Don't own HIMYM or any other references to TV/Movies I make.

~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~

Ted was animatedly discussing the Avengers movie they has just finished watching as they drank scotch in their favorite bar, McClarens. Barney interjected a comment here or there, but mostly just listened as Ted happily pointed out the interesting technology he wishes existed in their lives.

As a girl approached the table, Ted trailed off and looked at his drink in irritation. Barney rolled his eyes and kicked Ted under the table. Ted looked up and smiled as his eyes widened in recognition. His nose crinkled in disapproval as Barney tipped his glass towards the girl. "Helooo Ted's hot sister Heather."

Heather laughed and hugged Ted as he stood to greet her. She slid into the booth while Ted spoke accusingly. "You didn't tell me you were coming."

"Well, you didn't tell me you and Barney are dating." Heather retaliated.

Ted spit his sip of beer across the booth. "I-Wha-It's-Not-I-"

"Jesus dude!" Barney cried indignantly over Ted's spluttering. He wiped the beer off of his suit in irritation. "This is my tiny fiber suit. Tiny fibers, Ted!"

"Sorry." Ted took a deep breath and turned to heather. "How could you tell?"

"For the five minutes I spied on you when I walked in, Barney's eyes haven't strayed from you once, even with the eight super hot chicks at the bar. Not to mention the patented Sam Winchester bitch-face you pulled when he called me hot." She explained shrugging.

Barney snorted as Ted protested. "I did not make a bitch face Heather. Just- What are you doing here anyway?"

She hesitated. "I read something I wanted to talk to you about, but it'll kill the mood. Can I crash with you tonight? We can talk in the morning."

"You came all the way over here from...from...Wait where are you staying now?" Ted questioned.

"Philly."

"No shit!" Barney exclaimed. "We were there a couple weeks ago. We licked the liberty bell. It was legen- Wait for it-"

"-Dary." Heather finished for him smiling as he stuck his tongue out at her. "That is actually pretty fricking awesome."

"Seriously?" Ted frowned in anger. "You live in Phillidelphia and you didn't tell me."

"Chill dude. I just moved there two weeks ago." She explained.

"Whatever." Ted huffed. "What do you want Heather? Just tell me now."

She hesitated again, before pulling out a newspaper clipping. " I just need to know. I don't know how to ask this. Just-Can you just read it?"

Ted took the article and read it. His pallor became deathly white. Barney leaned forward, concerned. "Ted? What's wrong? Heather? What the fuck!" Ted passed the article back to her and firmly planted his gaze on his hands which Barney now held. Every ounce of humor was gone from Barney's face as he studied Ted. "What's wrong?" He asked gently.

Ted ignored him and addressed his sister. "What do you want me to say Heather?"

"I knew it. I fucking knew it." She stood up angrily and stormed out. Ted followed, Barney quickly behind him.

"Heather, seriously? What do you want me to say?" Ted asked again when they caught up with her.

"Why didn't you tell anyone?"

Ted sighed. "What makes you think I didn't?"

"No, like mom or dad. They could have done something." Heather insisted.

"Again, what makes you think I didn't?" Ted replied, turning his head to the unusually clear sky for new york. He could just make out the stars.

"You told them?" Heather's eyes widened incredulously.

Keeping his eyes focused upward, he explained tiredly. "Yes. They didn't believe me. The next month I got that trust fund."

"So he basically paid you off?" She asked angrily. "Would you stop looking at the stars?"

"Why? I like stars." He didn't remove his eyes from the expansive sky as Barney grabbed his hand lightly and Ted tightened his grip. It was his only lifeline. "The trust fund was completely unnecessary. I never touched it, except for Lily and Marshall's wedding and for you of course. I would never have told anyone else anyway. My parents didn't believe me, so no one would. Look, it was a long time ago. It happened. It's over. I'm glad he's gone now, but I don't know what you want from me." He finally looked in her general direction gaining strength from Barney's steady grip.

"I didn't know that's why you had that money though. I don't know if I should keep taking it. I mean before I just thought he was an ass who gave money to you instead of me, but now I know and I can't take that. It's like blood money or something." She shuddered. "It's creepy and horrible,"

"Heather look, I don't have enough saved of my own money to help you right now. I mean I do, but I'm saving it for me and my future and if I have kids."

"Of course you'll have kids-two remember, Luke and Leia, like you've always wanted." Barney interjected.

Ted smiled for the first time since his sister brought out the news clipping. "The point is the money helps you. You need it until you find what you want out of life and it's just sitting there gaining interest, so please. I want you to have it. I like to know you have some steady income to rely on. I like to know you're taken care of."

"Okay. Alright. I'm sorry I brought it up. I just had to know. I hate thinking about bad things happening to you and it puts a lot of things in perspective, you know. Can I crash on your couch tonight?" Heather asked dropping the subject.

"Of course you can. Can you tell me if you move next time? Philly's close. We could see each other more." Ted looped his arm around Heather's and led the way to his apartment.

Barney trailed behind silently, but when they reached the apartment, he burst. "What puts what in perspective? What the hell is going on?" All three of them jumped at the outburst, not even Barney expecting to erupt like that.

"Heather, can you just go in? Make yourself at home. We need a minute." She nodded and left. Ted sighed. "I don't want to talk about this, so don't interrupt me. I know if I don't tell you, you'll never be able to let it go or trust me completely. So, I'll tell you, but we are never discussing it. We are never bringing it up again. It has taken me a long time to move on and sometimes I'm not sure I actually have. The article she had said our uncle died, the same uncle who left me that trust fund I have but never touch, except like I said for Heather. She gets three thousand a month and I gave ten thousand to Marshall and Lily for their wedding."

"What did the article say?" Barney asked impatiently.

"Don't interrupt me!" Ted snapped in exasperation.

"You were rambling." Barney whined.

"It's too hard for me to talk about. I can't do this." Ted said suddenly, making his way for the apartment door, effectively ending the conversation, or so he thought.

"I'm sorry Ted. I won't interrupt. I promise. I'm sorry. Really, please tell me. You can trust me."

"I know I can trust you." Ted said automatically, not actually sounding like he knew that at all. "So, maybe I have confidence issues and maybe I've tried to kill myself more than once and maybe I can't deal with things sometimes and I lock myself away from everyone for days like when my mom got married, but I deal with it the best I can." Ted sighed and paused.

Barney bit his tongue to keep from interrupting. Concern the main emotion on his face.

"They found child pornography in my uncle's house and videotapes he made with himself and kids. It's in the article heather showed me."He took a deep breath in preparation. "I was little and it's been over for a long time." He didn't specify. He didn't need to judging from the look of horror on Barney's face. He had gotten the point. "I told my parents. They didn't believe me or didn't want to. I tried to kill myself every time I came home from seeing him. Heather and I were sent there every summer until I turned fifteen." A few tears fell from Ted's eyes. "Why am I crying? It's been over for years. It doesn't matter anymore."

Barney pulled him into a hug and finally spoke again. "Of course it matters . He hurt you. Wonderful, wonderful you. You are so kind and so sweet and always willing to help anyone and that asshole hurt you and I know you said you didn't want to talk about it. But God I want to kill him. If he was still alive, I would."

"No. you wouldn't. You're not capable of that." Ted argued as he buried himself in Tony's neck.

"You really have no idea what I do for a living do you?" Barney chided.

Ted laughed. "Nope. You always change the subject."

"Please." Barney rolled his eyes, then kissed Ted's eyes wiping the stray tears away.

"I'm okay, you know." Ted said quietly.

"I know you are, but I want you to be more than okay. I want you to be happy." Barney replied firmly.

"Happy huh?" Ted smiled. "You make me happy."

"Good" Barney hugged him close for a few minutes. "Well, let's go see if your sister trashed your apartment yet."

"Yet? Why is my apartment being trashed an inevitability?"

~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~yenrab~n~det~

So, yeah, maybe I have some dark dreams...


End file.
